Sunday Talk

Here is a copy of the talk I gave in Sacrament meeting today. I'd post Garys too, but he isn't like me and has to write down every word. He's a good speaker and can just go off notes.

Being the first to speak means I have the chance to introduce our family to the ward. Gary and I are both originally from Salt Lake and have finally moved back after living in Southern Idaho and Arizona. We met in a student ward at the University of Utah and have been married for four and a half years. I graduated from the U in 2002, and Gary graduated from Utah State this past May. Gary served a mission in Germany and is a member of the Utah Army National Guard. I have the privilege of staying home with our son, Daniel, who is 15 months old. We are expecting our second little boy in March.

The bishop has asked us both to speak on The Family: A Proclamation to the World. I would like to focus on just part of it – the role of a mother.

In the proclamation it reads: “Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children.” In preparing this talk, I asked myself what it means to nurture a child. The dictionary says it means to nourish, to educate, or to form and refine.

To nourish. After being a mother myself for a year or so now, I think I have somewhat of an understanding of what it means to nourish our little boy, at least in the physical sense. It’s getting him to eat vegetables instead of cookies and at least trying to get him to eat the foods that are good for his body instead of the leftover Halloween candy. There is another aspect to nourishing a child though. The proclamation says that parents have a responsibility to care for both the physical and spiritual needs of their children. So, how can I nourish Daniel spiritually? The First Presidency says to teach him to love and serve others, to obey the commandments of God and to be a law-abiding citizen.

To Educate. President Boyd K. Packer told a story a few years ago that gave me a new perspective on how important the role of a mother is in the Church. He said ”I recently saw a woman respond when it was said of another, “Since she had the new baby, she isn’t doing anything in the Church.” You could almost see a baby in her arms as she protested with emotion: “She is doing something in the Church. She gave that baby life. She nurtures and teaches it. She is doing the most important thing that she can do in the Church.”

Educating our children is a task that we should not take lightly. Not only should we be diligent in making sure they do their homework, or study for that history test on Friday, but we also need to educate them in more important matters. It is the responsibility of mothers to teach their children the gospel. President Benson emphasized the things that mothers should teach their children. “Mothers, take time to teach your children. Catch the teaching moments. This can be done anytime during the day—at mealtime, in casual settings, or at special sit-down times together, at the foot of the bed at the end of the day, or during an early morning walk together. Mothers, you are your children’s best teacher. Don’t shift this precious responsibility to day-care centers or baby-sitters. A mother’s love and prayerful concern for her children are her most important ingredients in teaching her own. Teach children gospel principles. Teach them it pays to be good. Teach them there is no safety in sin. Teach them a love for the gospel of Jesus Christ and a testimony of its divinity. Teach your sons and daughters modesty, and teach them to respect manhood and womanhood. Teach your children sexual purity, proper dating standards, temple marriage, missionary service, and the importance of accepting and magnifying Church callings. Teach them a love for work and the value of a good education. Teach them the importance of the right kind of entertainment, including appropriate movies and videos and music and books and magazines. Discuss the evils of pornography and drugs, and teach them the value of living the clean life. Yes, mothers, teach your children the gospel in your own home, at your own fireside. This is the most effective teaching that your children will ever receive. This is the Lord’s way of teaching. The Church cannot teach like you can. The school cannot. The day-care center cannot. But you can, and the Lord will sustain you. Your children will remember your teachings forever, and when they are old, they will not depart from them. They will call you blessed—their truly angel mother. Mothers, this kind of heavenly, motherly teaching takes time—lots of time. It cannot be done effectively part-time. It must be done all the time in order to save and exalt your children. This is your divine calling.”

To form and refine. When I was a teenager, I don’t think I realized how important a role I would play in the future lives of my children. When Gary and I were dating I told him that, when I was a mother, I wanted to stay at home with my children. He agreed and we both worked hard after we were married until we reached the point where that could be a reality. Some women, like my mother, aren’t able to be home full-time with their children. The proclamation on the family makes provision for that, saying that circumstance might necessitate individual adaptation. But it does not make excuse for a mother not nurturing her children. It says that those who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God.

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland told us that “There is nothing more important in this world than participating so directly in the work and glory of God, in bringing to pass the mortality and earthly life of His daughters and sons, so that immortality and eternal life can come in those celestial realms on high.” In the last few weeks Daniel has been learning to walk on his own. As I encourage him and help him to take those steps, I am watching him form the basis of his independent mobility and helping to refine his technique until I will be running after him down the hall. In the future, Gary and I will help him to form and refine his testimony by teaching him the gospel and by encouraging him to take the necessary steps to be worthy to receive his temple covenants and serve a mission.

In closing, I would like to read a story for you that emphasized to me the important role of a mother in the family.

“It was a busy day in our Costa Mesa, California, home. But then, with ten children and one on the way, every day was a bit hectic. On this particular day, however, I was having trouble doing even routine chores-all because of one little boy.
Len, who was three at the time, was on my heels no matter where I went. Whenever I stopped to do something and turned back around, I would trip over him. Several times I patiently suggested fun activities to keep him occupied.
"Wouldn't you like to play on the swing set?" I asked again. But he simply smiled an innocent smile and said, "Oh, that's all right, Mommy. I'd rather be in here with you." Then he continued to bounce happily along behind me. After stepping on his toes for the fifth time, I began to lose my patience and insisted that he go outside and play with the other children. When I asked him why he was acting this way, he looked up at me with sweet green eyes and said, "Well, Mommy, in Primary my teacher told me to walk in Jesus' footsteps. But I can't see him, so I'm walking in yours."
I gathered Len in my arms and held him close. Tears of love and humility spilled over from the prayer that grew in my heart-a prayer of thanks for the simple yet beautiful perspective of a three-year-old boy.”
I would like to bear you my testimony that there is no more important thing in my life than being a wife and mother. The love that fills me every time I look at our son reaffirms to me the important work Gary and I have in raising him. I know that the family is the eternal order and I hope that when I return to our heavenly father he won’t have to ask me “Where is your family?” I know President Hinckley is a true prophet and that the Book of Mormon is the word of God. I love my husband and our family and we’re happy to be here in this ward and to be welcomed by everyone.